you can pray your heart out hoping he hears you but he doesn’t
life can spiral out of control way faster than you can even find something or someone to hold on to
sometimes if it’s an illness, you cannot really control the thought processes or cycle
in the end, everything failed
you want to fight it, you try your best to fight it – day in day out
but there is only so much you can struggle with at one time till it overwhelms and consumes all of you
at the end of the day, i was wrong again. i thought willpower and determination can surpass and go beyond a real diagnosis. i now realise painfully it cannot realistically do so. i was wrong.
i said that it’s die trying to live not live trying to die
maybe somethings is beyond our control when it is a real illness you’re dealing with
i did give warning signs before things got this bad
there was no one who cared to listen
my fate, my destiny.