the times when i get really really sick, i dream of the most beautiful and happiest moments of my life. i vividly remember whilst i was in icu recently, everytime i fell asleep, i dreamt of the 1 thing i really truly want most in this life: family. the ones who really really matters. the love. the warmth. i remember being asleep for very very long periods of time there. it wasn’t comfortable at all. both hands were hooked up to all sorts of lines and body was hooked up to all kinds of machines to sustain my life.
but it was the most beautiful of dreams that i remember most. and that i really cherished. opening my eyes and waking up to find myself in reality and in so much pain was the hardest and toughest thing to face. that i was not where i was in my dreams. that i was actually in icu 10.
i cried each time i had to wake up. not to the pain. but that it was and will always remain just a dream. and this is what ive to live with.
at this point in my life, i fervently wish of such dreams. at least im happy in my sleep. at least for once reality didn’t matter. im human too.