Approx. 2 years ago when i went knocking on the doors of almost every pharma companies out there, doors were slammed shut repeatedly and incessantly at my face. I faced rejections after rejections – the ordeal was painful and depressing but i took each door slammed as a lesson on how i can better position marketing the company in a much better way. Although i placed a lot of effort and took immense pride in my work and proposals, i never took the rejections personally to heart. I persisted. Till today. It is an endless pursuit for me. I get to choose accounts now.
Fast forward in comparison, the impact of having a door slammed right at your face from someone who is and has been integral figure in your life for at least 6 years. Nothing, no words can replace or articulate the heartfelt earnest emotional and devastating pain and hurt from within. Perhaps i’ve never learnt still how to deal with rejection in 36 years and 2 months old. The harshest reality and emotion of the world. I mask it all within.
It has never ever been my principle to beg where i am clearly not wanted and have been rejected in emotional sense. I value my dignity till the very end of my life, regardless of how i choose my life to end. And i’ll never be back unless it’s in a stretcher in a body bag.
In the end, i am actually only human.
ps: if only you were still alive…